Sex on Campus
Thursday, October 25, 2007

It was with more than a little fear and trembling that I wrote this column - "Sex on Campus" - in the United Methodist Reporter this week. No one has ever accused me of being a saint, and I was about as far from sainthood as you could get during my own college years. But time and maturity cause one to reflect, not only one's own past but also on the way that environments play such a key role in helping people to live in healthy ways. I'd be curious to hear readers' thoughts on this column in particular.
I believe there is very little that is healthy about the recreational pursuits of college students these days. The levels of substance abuse and casual sex, the inattention to engagement with the larger world, and the neglect of virtue formation all have real consequences for later life. Bad habits ingrained during the formative years tend to stick around and only become worse.
By the way, I wasn't picking on Duke in particular in the blog post. I only use it as an example of the permissiveness of campus culture because it is the campus I happen to walk around on everyday. And despite all the Duke lacrosse controversy over the past year-and-a-half, I don't think Duke is any worse than most places.
Amy Forbus had this to say on the Reporter's own blog about the issue of campus culture. Her comments about the "Shirttails Serenade" tradition at our own alma mater, Hendrix College, is right on: "Back then I saw it as innocent fun. Now it seems far less innocent." You could say that about a lot of the troubling behavior that happens on campuses. We have lost the sense that virtue formation is something that is intimately connected with an educated person.

7 Comments:
This is good stuff to read, and another case in point of us becoming who (what) our parents were, "back in the day" when they lamented the moral decadence then pursued on college campuses.
On what basis ought we expect this generation of young adults to hear us any differently than we heard our parents?
Good question, Steve. I wonder if Andrew and I have any chance of being heard as voices "in the middle" because we aren't parents?
It seems that rather than an all or nothing policy regarding pre-marital sex, the Church would be better suited to actually talk about sexual ethics. What makes sex good and just? What makes our relationships ethical and loving?
When we promote an all or nothing ethic in regard to premarital sex, we lose our opportunity to talk about sexual ethics and just relationships. This leaves many young adults thinking that all one needs to have sex is a marriage license. God wants something far greater than a license to have sex. God requires we have mutual, loving relationships...and whether we like it or not these can happen both in and outside of martiage.
That's an interesting question, Amy: I'm inclined to think, though, that the younger people would tend to hear you the same way as any other adult who has merely given in to that older person's way of thinking.
I think you are onto something, tls... What we need (as adults in the church) to do is model healthy intimate relationships and do so in ways that make us available to younger people.
Yeah, probably so, Steve. And I'm with tls as far as talking sexual ethics. The attitude of "when you get married, what we've told you is wrong up until now is suddenly the most-right thing in the world" just doesn't cut it. And neither does avoiding the subject.
I am with tls about talking sexual ethics, but I think the church has to draw the line at saying that the only qualifier for a sexual relationship is a mutual, loving relationship. There are all kinds of reasons why sex is supposed to be reserved for marriage - from its connection with procreation to the very notion of what a covenental relationship is supposed to be about. If anyone is interested in a fairly compelling (and highly readable) account of celibacy in singleness and fidelity in marriage, check out Lauren Winner's "Real Sex: The Naked Truth About Chastity."
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